What Even… Literal outfit from hell

So… I bought a new nightie. Everyone that knows my sister and I know we like cute things. Puppies, kitties, stuffies, clothes. Her right now is socks, I’ve got my fair share of adorable socks but lately, I’ve been on this nightie shopping spree. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed with them at the moment but it’s a real problem. Not just for my dresser but for my damn bank account lol. I have more sleepwear then I can honestly find a use for.

But anyway, this nightie, it is all sorts of cute and sexy (Thank you Torrid) it’s purple with black trim and lacey. I picked it because I have a similarly styled one from Lane Bryant; and now that I think about it, that one is black with a purple trim…. I see a pattern coming along.

I snapped a couple of photos but I couldn’t bother to take a full body one cause effort. If I look unimpressed it’s because I am lol.

I bought it because, sometimes a girl wants to go to bed feeling sexy. Even if the only other living things you share that bed with is a fluffy snoring black cat (I love that furball) or 1 of 2 attention seeking mutts.

My problem is this. What the fuck was I thinking. If I were to use this as an outfit for some sexy time, how the fuck am I supposed to get this contraption on, let alone off. It has an underwire which should have been my first red flag but purple and lacey and it’s all halter top type babydoll. It was also on clearance…

But this evil shit has every woman’s bane of existence…a legit bra stap. But noooooo not your typical one with 2 hooks, not even 3. It has 7! What the actual fluff? Who the hell needs 7 evil hooky things on their bra and who in their right mind wants to sleep with poking underwire. The point of being home and out of the public eye is that my girls get to be free! I don’t need to wear undies damn it, that’s why I have a bedroom door!

And another thing… getting this thing on is a workout. I don’t need a workout post shower, unless it’s the fun kind 😉. I go to the gym 4-5 times a week for that. Age and Ds/DDs means gravity has inevitably won the battle and my tits are not as perky as they used to be but I am not sleeping with an underwire stabbing me in my side, I freaking refuse.

Fuck that noise. When I get the energy to fight this contraption that my boobs are encaged in off, I’m cutting this damn underwire out.

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P.S. Shut up Melie. Like you’ve never struggled with clothes before! Karma I tell you, karma.

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